Healing Broken Relationships Message Series

HEALING BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS

Part 1 – Practical Help in Getting Along with Others
(Ephesians 4:25-30)

Dr. Mark S. Hartman, Lead Pastor
October 15, 2023

INTRODUCTION

A. A Stanford University research project discovered that 87% of success is actually people knowledge and only 13% is product knowledge.

B. Ephesians 4:25-30 Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. 29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. (NIV)

1. CONTROL YOUR TONGUE. (Ephesians 4:25, 29)

A. A tongue under control tells the truth. (Ephesians 4:25)
Ephesians 4:25 Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, because we are all members of one body.

1. We are to tell the truth because what holds us together is trust.
Lying always rips the fabric of trust that holds us together.

2. Ephesians 4:15 Speak the truth in love.
Sometimes we have to confront and it’s hurtful, but every time we “speak the truth” there should be a desire to repair the situation with a graciousness in our words, not a desire to hit back the person that might have wounded you.

B. A tongue under control encourages each other. (Ephesians 4:29)

1. Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome (mean, rotten, sour) talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

2. Job 16:4-5 …I could spout off my criticisms against you and shake my head at you. 5 But that’s not what I would do. I would speak in a way that helps you. I would try to take away your grief.

3. Proverbs 16:24 Kind words are like honey—sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.

2. RESPOND WISELY to negative MOMENTS. (Ephesians 4:26-27)

A. Ephesians 4:26-27 In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold.

1. There are three Greek words for anger:

a. “Thumos” means a volatile, wild, uncontrollable rage.

b. “Parorgismos” is an anger that is a simmering anger which develops into a deep-seated resentment.

c. “Orge” is the word for anger that is a righteous indignation.

B. To be angry and not sin means that I stay in control. (Ephesians 4:26-27)

Ephesians 4:26-27 In your anger do not sin: do not let the sun go down while you are angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.

1. Limit our anger’s duration.

2. Limit our anger’s intensity.

3. DON’T LET THINGS RUIN YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH OTHERS. (Ephesians 4:28)

A. Ephesians 4:28 He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.

B. Don’t covet or steal what belongs to someone else.

1. Be thankful for what God has already given to you instead of wanting what someone else has.

2. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 Be thankful in all circumstances, because this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

C. Work hard to meet your own needs.

D. Care about others in need while you take care of yourself.